It's been a minute.
I've been...pouting. No. Really, I, uh-
I've been pouting.
When I got out of the hospital on December 31st, 2020, everyone around me said the same thing: "God didn't bring you this far just to drop you on your keister."
Fair enough.
My prayer life from then on consisted of me waiting for signs. I watched doors open and shut, reminding myself that sometimes what we see is not what we are destined to take on. Was I supposed to go back into pediatric psych care? Law? I knew family, marriage, and love were off the table. God had been telling me no to that for years. Was I supposed to be a minister? Insane, unreasonable avenues presented themselves and some went away when I started to examine the details, and then there were others that I knew were not the right thing.
"Look!" God says, "I did a thing!" (Isaiah 43: 19) Unlike when Jeremy Clarkson says that, one has to look and see why God wants us to note His new thing. What I saw was a clearer view of how I was blessed. I have a studio, music, and a body of photographic work that has become the stepstool to move me to the next part of my life.
I have also found peace and a greater degree of discernment. Forgiving and then walking away from people who need to leave me alone and find their own joy was one part of it. Learning to narrow down that focus and lose the almost comically desperate need to be seen is another part of this. Setting my own boundaries and definitions for what connects me to that which is bigger than me could never happen at seminary or divinity school. I know that now. And to my friends who never left and a few who have found common sources of joy: Thank you falettin' me be mice elf agin!
Even though I know as 2026 progresses, things are gonna get loud and crowded at times, God also revealed that life is good when I am sitting in an overstuffed chair cuddling my cat bestie or reading a good book.
Some things I am looking forward to in 2026:
Ovechkin setting records.
Exploring new ways to move.
Reading.
More sushi!
Getting my studio in order.
Going back to school.
The best garden ever!
Fingers crossed I have a treatment team that will help me stay well.
There are other things I haven't listed. Maybe I'll write about them later on. Until then, I hope everyone who sees this is prepared to have a great 2026!
XOXOXO
Warrior Churchmouse, MouseMom, and Marigold the BossyCat
I've been...pouting. No. Really, I, uh-
I've been pouting.
When I got out of the hospital on December 31st, 2020, everyone around me said the same thing: "God didn't bring you this far just to drop you on your keister."
Fair enough.
My prayer life from then on consisted of me waiting for signs. I watched doors open and shut, reminding myself that sometimes what we see is not what we are destined to take on. Was I supposed to go back into pediatric psych care? Law? I knew family, marriage, and love were off the table. God had been telling me no to that for years. Was I supposed to be a minister? Insane, unreasonable avenues presented themselves and some went away when I started to examine the details, and then there were others that I knew were not the right thing.
"Look!" God says, "I did a thing!" (Isaiah 43: 19) Unlike when Jeremy Clarkson says that, one has to look and see why God wants us to note His new thing. What I saw was a clearer view of how I was blessed. I have a studio, music, and a body of photographic work that has become the stepstool to move me to the next part of my life.
I have also found peace and a greater degree of discernment. Forgiving and then walking away from people who need to leave me alone and find their own joy was one part of it. Learning to narrow down that focus and lose the almost comically desperate need to be seen is another part of this. Setting my own boundaries and definitions for what connects me to that which is bigger than me could never happen at seminary or divinity school. I know that now. And to my friends who never left and a few who have found common sources of joy: Thank you falettin' me be mice elf agin!
Even though I know as 2026 progresses, things are gonna get loud and crowded at times, God also revealed that life is good when I am sitting in an overstuffed chair cuddling my cat bestie or reading a good book.
Some things I am looking forward to in 2026:
Ovechkin setting records.
Exploring new ways to move.
Reading.
More sushi!
Getting my studio in order.
Going back to school.
The best garden ever!
Fingers crossed I have a treatment team that will help me stay well.
There are other things I haven't listed. Maybe I'll write about them later on. Until then, I hope everyone who sees this is prepared to have a great 2026!
XOXOXO
Warrior Churchmouse, MouseMom, and Marigold the BossyCat
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