We Do Shakespeare With Tin Cans And String
"You do what?" I was not sure I heard Kevin right. They're still performing, but how?
"I was kidding," he shouted.
"You really said tin cans and string?"
"It might as well be." Kevin sighed. "It's not what we hope it will be. It's not entirely bad. It's different. I don't know."
"So nobody is with anybody else? What- How are you doing this?"
"Zoom," he said. "Zooooooom! Brought to you by the letter arrrgh! and the numbers pi, google, and phhhblt!"
"Not liking it, hunh?"
"We were rehearsing Hamlet the other day. Ophelia's in her little box acting like meth tart. I'm in my box, looking suitably horrified. I said- Give me a minute. I said: 'And in the morn and liquid dew of youth. Contagious blastments are most imminent.Be wary then; best safety lies in fear.Youth to itself rebels, though none else near.' And she looks straight ahead. I can tell she's blanking. Then she smacks her lips and says, 'Sure, Jan!' We are just a heartbeat away from burning the Smithsonian to stay warm and eating the children."
"I thought we were saving burning the archives for January. It's a bit summery to do that now, don't you think?"
Kevin wasn't laughing.
"You are the only person who hates technology more than my mother. She's tried texting and the results are unintentionally funny. The other day she told one of her friends she could feel Guh-ned's presence in her back yard."
"Guh-ned?" He asked.
"God. She has a feature phone she will not replace and to text she has to scroll through to the letter she wants and pause until it stops blinking so she can scroll to the next letter. So she was giving praises to Gned. Of course she got frustrated and I try to be always ready with my phone. Yes, I know it's an antique, but it has a keypad. Please don't go there. I hate smart phones almost as much as she hates anything that was developed after the turn of the century."
"You picked a heck of a time to entertain technophobia," Kevin said.
"Kev! Did I tell you I'm grinding my own flour?"
"I don't even know you anymore!"
"I love you too, Bubba." I waited for him to soften. He always does when faced with my silliness.
"Not going to jinx this," he said. "Stay safe. I need rest. Tomorrow we're attempting The Sunshine Boys."
"Break a leg! Maybe I'll get Mom to text you that she klonts you."
"I klont you, too."
"I was kidding," he shouted.
"You really said tin cans and string?"
"It might as well be." Kevin sighed. "It's not what we hope it will be. It's not entirely bad. It's different. I don't know."
"So nobody is with anybody else? What- How are you doing this?"
"Zoom," he said. "Zooooooom! Brought to you by the letter arrrgh! and the numbers pi, google, and phhhblt!"
"Not liking it, hunh?"
"We were rehearsing Hamlet the other day. Ophelia's in her little box acting like meth tart. I'm in my box, looking suitably horrified. I said- Give me a minute. I said: 'And in the morn and liquid dew of youth. Contagious blastments are most imminent.Be wary then; best safety lies in fear.Youth to itself rebels, though none else near.' And she looks straight ahead. I can tell she's blanking. Then she smacks her lips and says, 'Sure, Jan!' We are just a heartbeat away from burning the Smithsonian to stay warm and eating the children."
"I thought we were saving burning the archives for January. It's a bit summery to do that now, don't you think?"
Kevin wasn't laughing.
"You are the only person who hates technology more than my mother. She's tried texting and the results are unintentionally funny. The other day she told one of her friends she could feel Guh-ned's presence in her back yard."
"Guh-ned?" He asked.
"God. She has a feature phone she will not replace and to text she has to scroll through to the letter she wants and pause until it stops blinking so she can scroll to the next letter. So she was giving praises to Gned. Of course she got frustrated and I try to be always ready with my phone. Yes, I know it's an antique, but it has a keypad. Please don't go there. I hate smart phones almost as much as she hates anything that was developed after the turn of the century."
"You picked a heck of a time to entertain technophobia," Kevin said.
"Kev! Did I tell you I'm grinding my own flour?"
"I don't even know you anymore!"
"I love you too, Bubba." I waited for him to soften. He always does when faced with my silliness.
"Not going to jinx this," he said. "Stay safe. I need rest. Tomorrow we're attempting The Sunshine Boys."
"Break a leg! Maybe I'll get Mom to text you that she klonts you."
"I klont you, too."